Berserker Road

April, 1994

Austria

The three flatbed trucks rumbled through the Austrian countryside. Making their way from the military airfield where they had arrived from Britain, they were now heading for a small Austrian military weapons testing range where they would be off-loading their cargo. On the rear-most truck was a Z-Force battle tank. The middle truck carried an Armadillo mini-tank and a Z-Force jeep. The lead truck carried the vehicles for testing, a pair of modified Z-Force jeeps. In the cab, Wheels was sitting next to the driver reading the file provided by Special Weapons Force on the modifications.

Special Weapons Force had made several changes to Action Force vehicles over the years; the SAS Force Battle Bike was a Rapid-Fire Bike with the sidecar-minigun removed and a pair of 9mm guns added under the nose fairing, for example. In recent months, the Z-Force jeep, a mainstay of the unit since its formation, was losing its role to the American-built Hammer jeeps, which had better armour and weapons. In an effort to find a use for the venerable jeeps, SWF had come up with the Improved Weapons Kit, or I-Wick, to give the vehicles extra life. The I-Wick basically added an armour shell to the rear deck, in place of the usual roll-cage, with a variety of weapons fits available.

I-Wick Mk. I was a simple gun turret in the middle of the shell, which allowed for the mounting of a machine-gun like the FN MAG light machine-gun, the M2 .50 calibre heavy machine-gun or even the M134 minigun. The Mk II I-Wick offered a turret operated from inside the vehicle that mounted four light anti-tank missiles, such as the US TOW missile, the French HOT or the British Swingfire. A third version mounting six FIM-92 surface-to-air missiles was also being developed.

The Mk II and Mk III I-Wick were particularly of interest to Wheels, since they would fill capability gaps in Z-Force. Currently, the unit’s anti-tank capability was either with man-portable systems, the Wolverine multiple-launch rocket system vehicle or the small surface-to-surface rockets mounted on their ATCs and Hammers. The anti-air capability of Z-Force lay in the Whirlwind towed twin gun system, fixed air-defence units or man-portable systems. The Whirlwind, however was not an ideal option, it depended on being stationary to fire and wasn’t quick to be moved. An attempt to create a mobile gun system, mating a Whirlwind turret to a Wolverine chassis, had been made by Special Weapons Force. It hadn’t made it to production due to problems with the controls. Although SAS Force had their own mobile SAM vehicles in the Mobile Missile System or the Puma, a modified version of the Cobra Stinger jeep, Z-Force lacked its own system. Wheels didn’t know why they’d not bought Pumas of their own, as they had with the Hammer, Recon Jeep and Wolverine.

Sighing, the Dutchman put aside the paper work and fished out a small bottle of water from a pouch on his belt. As he swigged, he looked around the roomy four-seater cab. Driving the truck was Big Rig, an American inter-state trucker recruited to Z-Force some years earlier. Sitting in the seats behind them were Ton-Up, the Swedish Z-Force NCO who normally drove Wolverines or the Armadillo mini-tank and Roadhog, another Z-Force jeep driver. Roadhog was asleep, snoring lightly, behind Wheels. Ton-Up, however, was awake and reading a British comic book. A US comics publisher had started selling comics based on GI Joe’s exploits some years earlier. Finally, their UK arm had begun producing their own ‘Action Force’ comic; using what information they could glean from public sources or whatever they made up.

Wheels rolled his eyes. “I still can’t believe you read that rubbish,” he commented to Ton-Up.

The Swede didn’t even tear his eyes from the pages. “Hey man, leave me alone, plenty of us read it. The stories are pretty good, even when they make stuff up.”

Wheels rolled his eyes again. The cover artwork showed two SAS Force soldiers, judging by the black and grey camo, firing slightly unrealistic M-16s next to a very curvy woman in a white uniform, firing an M-16 of her own with one hand, whilst punching the air with her other hand. Next to her was a blonde guy in a similar white uniform, a snarl on his lips, firing his own M-16. Canadian flags on their uniforms indicated they were apparently supposed to be Deke and Moosejaw, Wheels thought. Under the title, a separate banner read ‘Together with GI Joe Canada against The Red Shadows!’ whilst an explosion filled the background.

Wheels shook his head and turned away. Big Rig looked over at him before looking back at Ton-Up, “So, Ton-Up, what’s Wheels got against these four-colour funnies anyway?”

Ton-Up laughed, “Basically he hates the fact that in a story set at Christmas, they showed him getting a foo, I mean a soccer shirt for Christmas. He was shown getting an Ajax shirt and since he’s a PSV Eindhoven fan, he was not happy. Think giving a Yankees shirt to a Red Sox fan. I think he’s still holding a grudge.”

Wheels glowered at Ton-Up, but said nothing.

The trucks rumbled along the Austrian highway for a few more miles before the radio on the lead truck crackled.

“''Big Rig, this is Long Haul. I’ve got a visual on two Cobra Ferrets and an armed pick-up coming up on our six. They’re hauling ass, dodging through traffic. I don’t think they see us yet, but I can see them in my rear-view mirrors''."

Long Haul was the driver of the third Z-Force flatbed, a British Army truck driver.

“Roger that, Long Haul, play it cool, m’man, they might just pass us by.”

“Don’t bet on it, mate, we’ve got AF logos painted on our rear ramps, remember?”

Big Rig cursed even as the sound of automatic weapons fire erupted behind them.

“''We’re taking fire. Thankfully this clown on the lead Ferret’s just hitting the ramp and it’s armoured.”''

Wheels took the radio from Big Rig. “Long Haul, this is Wheels, any idea who they are?"

“''Affirmative, Trax has positive ID on Butcher on the lead Ferret. He thinks it’s Pyro on the second.”''

“The Berserkers,” Wheels spat the name like a curse.

“Who are the Berserkers?” Big Rig asked as he checked his rear-view mirror.

Ton-Up frowned at him. “Don’t they give threat briefings to Logistics and Transport?”

“Not very often,” Big Rig replied.

“They’re four Cobra troopers who Anna Conda allows to run amuck as an independent group at times. According to the head docs, they’re psychotic, sociopathic, narcissistic and various other words for mentally unstable. Butcher’s got a dangerous obsession with bladed weapons and cleavers. Hence the name. He’s a Cobra trooper. Pyro’s a Viper and has a mania for fire, blowing stuff up and incendiary weapons. Then there’s Triggerhappy, a former Crimson Guardsman who’s a weapons expert. Marksman and sniper trained, but just as happy to blaze away with a machine-gun. Last but by no means least, is Roadkill, a lunatic HISS driver who will eagerly run down anyone who crosses his path. He has an unhealthy taste for driving fast and dangerously. He’ll be the one in the pick-up,” Wheels explained. “Action Force have run into them several times, including when Quickfire was chased out of Anna Conda’s castle by Pyro and Butcher; the time Butcher and Triggerhappy stole a prototype weapon from Stonebury range and Kickback trashed a shopping precinct getting it back and then the four of them kidnapped the MoD liaison Trent’s daughter and wound up killing him when he tried rescuing her, single-handed.”

“Sounds like a right bunch of douchebags,” Big Rig commented.

“Got that right,” Roadhog said. He’d woken up without the others realising.

Bullets were still pinging off the armoured ramp of the rear truck, until Roadkill swerved out from behind it and sped up alongside, scattering cars as he did, allowing Triggerhappy to fire at the cab.

The Crimson Guardsman was rudely surprised when Trax opened fire at him with an MP5K sub-machine-gun. Triggerhappy wildly sprayed return fire at the truck, causing Trax to duck back inside, as the 7.62mm rounds bounced off the truck’s cab. Then Roadkill got a shock when Long Haul swerved the truck toward the pick-up, forcing the HISS driver to veer away, smashing into the guardrail and scraping the paint off as the vehicle slid along side before he regained enough control to veer back toward the truck.

Butcher opened fire at the truck with his Ferret’s 9mm guns in front of his handlebars, but the rounds had even less effect than the machine-gun rounds Triggerhappy was still blazing at the truck with.

In the cab of the second truck, Bronco, the Z-Force infantryman pulled out the M16 assault rifle he carried, wound down the window and leaned out. Bronco took aim and fired a single round at the pick-up truck. The bullet shattered the windscreen and caused Roadkill to slam on the brakes and swerve away. Bronco fired another, nearly hitting the pick-up’s rear-view mirror, but instead hitting the window in the driver’s door. Again, Roadkill swerved away, before trying to turn back. The Infantryman’s accuracy caused Triggerhappy to notice and turn his machine-gun on the second truck instead. Bronco ducked away, as the machine-gun rounds slammed into the armour. In the front of the cab, Road Ranger pulled a key from around his neck and handed it to Egghead, the Special Weapons Force test driver. “Unlock the glove box, there’s an MP5K inside, you can use it.”

“How can I use it, I’m in the wrong place?” Egghead asked.

Pointing with one hand, whilst steering with the other, Road Ranger indicated the hatch in the top of the cab. “Climb out there,” he said. “It’s supposed to be use to man a Ma Deuce in combat zones, but we don’t have one. You can get out though and climb on to the truck bed.”

Egghead looked at him incredulously, “You’re nuts!”

Bronco pulled back from the window as more rounds rattled off the armour. “I’ll do it,” he snapped. “Get out of the way.”

Egghead scrambled across the seats into the backseats. Bronco then scrambled the other way, before standing up and unlocking the hatch. Bronco clambered out the hatch, crouching on the cab before he slung his rifle over his shoulder and dropped on to the trailer.

None of the Berserkers were paying attention to him as he made his way unsteadily along the side of the Armadillo mini tank. Bronco unclipped the tarpaulin over the vehicle and allowed the wind to whip it aside. He climbed into the mini tank’s cockpit in the turret and scanned the unfamiliar controls. He soon found the weapons controls, rotated the turret and checked the four 40mm guns were loaded. They were; the shells had been fitted after the trucks had been off-loaded from the planes.

Bronco then activated the targeting system, aimed at the armed pick-up truck and fired. A single 40mm shell blasted out of the guns, slammed into the pick-up and threw it off the road, flipping it over in the process. The pick-up crashed down upside down, before exploding.

Both Ferrets opened fire at him as Pyro and Butcher tried to avenge their fallen comrades.

Their attention diverted, the two Berserkers left themselves open to Trax in the trailing truck and Roadhog in the lead truck. Both opened fire with MP5Ks. Butcher was hit in the arm and fell off his Ferret, nearly getting run over by a car behind him. The Cobra trooper managed to roll clear. His Ferret however was hit by the same car and shoved into the path of Big Rig’s truck, which slammed into it and sent it spinning across the road into the guardrail. Pyro was hit by Trax and fell off his Ferret and was promptly run over by the car behind him, which skidded to a halt.

The three Action Force trucks came to a halt, blocking the road.

The Z-Force soldiers dismounted from the trucks as Road Ranger called into Action Force’s Austrian headquarters to report on what had happened.

Bronco climbed down from the Armadillo after shutting it back down. He jogged back down the road to the burning wreckage of the pick-up truck.

As Wheels covered him, Roadhog flipped Pyro over and conducted a swift check of him.

“Crushed ribs, broken arms. He might yet live,” the Belgian said.

“Butcher’s only got a superficial arm wound,” Ton-Up called. “As well as bruising, that is.”

Bronco trotted back to the others. “No way Roadkill and Triggerhappy survived,” he reported as Big Rig opened a pair of handcuffs and restrained Butcher.

“You killed them!” Butcher snarled.

Bronco cradled his M16, barrel pointing toward the Berserker, “Yeah, I did. That’d be the same maniacs shooting at me and my mates. So spare me the whining.”

He looked back at Wheels who had holstered his sidearm. “Triggerhappy probably died when the pick-up landed anyway,” Bronco added.

Wheels shrugged. “Doesn’t really matter,” he replied. “It was a righteous kill anyway. Self-defence. Defence of innocent civilians.”

Austrian police cars and a pair of helicopters began racing toward them.

Long Haul turned at the sound of the sirens.

“Ah, the local authorities are here,” he commented. “I called them on my radio.”

Ton-Up glanced at the two Berserkers.

“End of the road, guys. You’ll be locked up for a long time to come,” the Swede commented.

Background
A short burst story, I wanted to do a story with some of Z-Force in that wasn't a massive battle story and I wanted to use the Berserkers. This was the result.

The idea of in-universe comics was one I came up with as I was writing, I honestly had no intention of doing that until I decided Ton-Up was reading and I needed something for him to be reading. It does neatly provide a way to excuse some of the wackiness of some stories: Oh, that was a comic from in-universe! [ETA: 25/3 I'm re-reading my IDW trades of the ARAH comics and I just noticed in #79 the news-stand the Joes are hiding under is selling Marvel comics, including both GI Joe and GI Joe: Special Missions, making in-universe Joe comics canon!]

The football rivalry thing was also a little fun, I had intended to make Wheels annoyed at being replaced by someone else in a story. I then decided to change it to a sports shirt, thinking since he's Dutch, I'd make him an Ajax fan, before realising he's from Eindhoven and then discovering PSV Eindhoven and Ajax are rivals, so it fell together well.

I had intended the story to be longer with much more of a chase and running battle going on, but after getting demotivated in my writing I decided to wrap it up quicker and that an extended chase wouldn't necessarily be a great read.